Natural affinities and natural antipathies begin in the subconscious, according to Carl Jung, the great Swiss psychologist. Both an instant liking and an instant disliking of an individual miss the mark because neither reaction tells us much about the individual. Most human personalities have negative and positive traits existing side by side. Our response to that person tells more about us than about them.

Here is the great secret about relationships: What we see, hear and feel about someone is really a projection of what is going on in our own psyche ... and has little to do with the other's reality.

We have conflict with those who seem to exhibit traits which reflect our negative or less developed side. Once we realize that, we no longer have to accuse, judge and blame others. We can work on adjusting own attitudes, and honing interpersonal skills. And that alone will make us more attractive to just about everyone, in just about all circumstances!